Goodbye 2008

Dear 2008,

I can't say that I'm sorry to see you go because, personally, I think you were without a doubt the worst year of my life.

The year started out with arthroscopy on my right knee, which really was much harder than I expected, and even harder to heal from. To make matters worse, the diagnosis was not good -- my knee was shot and the arthroscopy probably would not help and I would need a total knee replacement in the near future.

While I was healing from the arthroscopy, I was also healing from a bad round of kidney stones and UTIs so that wasn't much fun.

Then the worst blow you dealt me all year -- the sudden death of my beautiful and wonderful oldest child, Dawne. This has been so hard on me, my family, and everyone who loved her and misses her still. My grief has affected every part of my life and I still cannot believe that she is gone forever. I'm not the same person and know that I will never be the person I was. I miss her so much all the time. Even if the pain will get less in time, like everyone tells me, it will never go away.

While I was still reeling from the blow of the loss of Dawne, another loss, this time my job. I had to have the knee replacement because it was getting harder and harder to walk, so my boss tells me that if I have the surgery, I have to find another job. In this economy, it's not that easy to find another job, let alone a job that I truly loved as much as I loved this job. I loved my co-workers (for the most part!) so losing my job has been like losing part of my family to me. I miss going to work and interacting with everyone. I wonder sometimes if they miss me as well. 

And then my knee surgery! I knew it was going to be painful and I knew the recovery process would be long -- I was right about that part! When I first started out in physical therapy, I was told that for the first three months I would wonder why I had it done and after three months I would wonder why I didn't have it done sooner. Well, so far it hasn't been that way for me. I still have a lot of pain and my knee is still not responding like I think it should. The biggest problem has been the flexion and extension is not what it should be and should have been better by now. Part of that is because I waited probably too long before I had the surgery but I waited because I knew I was going to lose my job. Talk about a Catch 22! I hope my knee gets better but I'm not encouraged because it's been over four months already.

There have been a couple of good things that have happened this year, thank goodness. The main one is the birth of my grandson, Onslo, who is just the sweetest little guy. The other good thing that happened is that I finally graduated from college with my B.S. this summer, right before my knee surgery, and I was able to walk across the stage for my diploma.

Otherwise, 2008, you really have been a crappy year and I'm glad you're finally gone. I certainly hope your successor, 2009, is a much better and happier year than you have been.

A disgruntled patron,

Judee